Saturday, April 10, 2010
You know your rector is a conservative evangelical …
By Robin G. Jordan
1. When he talks about “confession,” he is referring to the Thirty-Nine Article.
2. When he refers to the altar as the communion table or the Lord’s Table and takes the entire service from the north end or side of the altar.
3. When he wears a loud Hawaiian shirt on summer Sunday mornings instead of his usual blue Oxford cloth shirt and prep school tie.
4. When he recites all the articles of the Thirty-Nine Articles from memory and adds Scripture references for each article.
5. When he adds a new holy day to the calendar—the feast of the Oxford martyrs.
6. When he uses the word “father,” he is referring to God, his dad, your dad, or you.
7. When he talks all the time about the importance of a personal relationship with Jesus Christ.
8. When he asks you when you first believed in Jesus Christ and were “saved.”
9. When he talks about the “Real Presence,” he means Christ’s presence in a Christian’s heart.
10. When he refuses to present your kid to the bishop for confirmation until he is convinced that your kid has really turned from his sins and trusts in Jesus Christ for his salvation.
11. When he does not wear vestments except when the bishop makes his visitation and then he wears only a cassock and surplice.
12. When the candles, cross, and flowers disappear from the altar and it is not even Good Friday.
13. When he talks all of the time about Christ’s sacrifice upon the cross in propriation for your sins.
14. When he peppers his sermons and the parish newsletter with quotes from Thomas Cranmer, John Jewel, Charles Simeon, J.C. Ryle, and other folks whom you have never heard of. .
15. When he spends the entire morning every weekday morning actually studying the Bible and preparing his Sunday sermons.
16. When he takes the youth group on an “outing” and all the kids come back excited about knocking on doors, chatting with old ladies, and handing out tracts and brochures.
17. When he talks about “the” Book of Common Prayer, he is referring to the 1662 English Prayer Book.
18. When he encourages you to read your Bible everyday and feed on God’s word and he believes what he is saying.
19. When he begins reading Morning Prayer or leading “Morning Worship” instead of Holy Communion on three Sundays of the month.
20. When he preaches a different sermon on Sunday evening than the one he preached on Sunday morning and expects you to come to hear both sermons.
21. When he keeps using the e-word in his sermons and encouraging the congregation to talking about Jesus with their friends, colleagues, and relatives.
22. When your kid can quote Scripture from memory and is more familiar with the Bible than you are.
23. When your kid washes cars and mows lawns for free to show people God’s love for them.
24. When your wife and her friends begin to meet at your house to study the Bible and drop hints you might like to join a men’s Bible study group.
25. When your kid asks you to let him go on a summer mission trip to a country you have never heard of.
26. When you overhear your kid telling the other kids at church that his dad is a backslider because you did not go with him on the father and son prayer walk.
27. Your wife keeps talking about how her life has changed since she began to live God’s way.
28. When your kid asks you when you first believed in Jesus Christ and were “saved.”
29. When you overhear your wife and your kid praying for you.
30. When your kid explains the gospel to you with stick drawings and challenges you to decide which way you are going to live—God’s way or your own way.
Posted by Robin G. Jordan at 10:18 AM