The Heidelblog: Why (Some) Reformed People Are Such Jerks

Steve Martin in The Jerk

The Oxford American Dictionary gives this informal usage of the noun jerk:

a contemptibly obnoxious person

About as soon as I left my evangelical (Southern Baptist) congregation and started associating with Reformed folk, I began to hear this question. I remember taking someone to a Reformed congregation and afterward she was in tears. Why? In part, she said, because she had never met such a cold congregation. Over the years I’ve fielded this question repeatedly, and it came up again recently. My (partial) answer is complex, so this post is a little long.

We need to challenge the premise of the question. Sometimes the question assumes a model of niceness and/or sweetness that may or may not have anything to do with the biblical doctrine of charity. In some cases we’re dealing with assumptions rooted in culture rather than Scripture. E.g., When we lived in England, we found that folk never asked us about our health. It’s considered rude. The day we left England, however, as soon as we got on the plane, we were pelted with questions by an American woman who was just being polite. What was rude in England was polite in Dallas. Was she nice or not? It depends upon where one lives.  Read more